Porcelain Until Dark
by willnorm
Summary: For Sookie's birthday, she gets a disappointing gift from Tara in the form of a realistic-looking doll, named Eric. But what happens when the doll comes alive after dark? Humour with some lemons thrown in eventually.
1. Chapter 1

_**Porcelain Until Dark**_

I was especially looking forward to heading into work and starting my afternoon shift at Merlotte's this evening. I knew it was bound to be a special and exciting night for me, than it normally was. Why, you ask? Because today was my twenty-fourth birthday. I don't care what people say; about the older you get, how birthday's become just another normal day to you. It honestly wasn't like that for me.

So, when I got into work fifteen minutes earlier to stow my bag away, I was pleased by everybody's reaction to my entrance. My boss, Sam, looked up as I entered, sang a real loud "Happy Birthday, Sookie!" and everybody else in the bar raised their pitcher of beers and sang it back to me ceremoniously in a way that made me feel wonderful. All the people I worked with came out to greet me; Lafayette, who worked out back as short-order cook came out the front and hugged me tightly. My close friend, Arlene Fowler, gave me a hug too, and even handed me a picture her little two-year-old son, Coby, had drawn for his 'Aunty Sookie'. Even Terry, the fellow she was dating who usually didn't smile very much, had pulled himself out of his habitual slump and cheered up enough to give me a little smile and a hug.

I felt I was glowing, as I basked in the attention. _Who doesn't love being cherished on their birthday?_

Fluttering about with happiness, I grinned to myself brightly as I crossed into the small staff area to stow my bag away safely in a locker. Much to my pleasure, my best friend, Tara Thornton, was waiting for my appearance personally herself. She jumped upright from the stool she was perched in the instance I pushed through the doors, attacking me with an enthusiastic, one-armed hug (She had a little wrapped up package, I noticed, in her other hand. Obviously she didn't want to crush it while hugging me. Whatever was packaged neatly away inside, it must have been something delicate and easily breakable).

She held the present out to me, and I felt the hugest grin stretch across my lips, as I accepted it. I was smiling so hard, I felt like a fool. Yes, I loved getting presents on my birthday. But so what? Sue me; So did everybody else.

"Gee, Tara," I laughed out loud in delight, "You shouldn't have!"

"Yes, I did. You got me something for my birthday, Sook."

I could feel her watching my face closely, gauging my reaction to her gift, as I tore the paper apart ruthlessly. What I saw made my stomach sink. It was a doll. A male doll; A tiny doll, about the length of my hand, maybe even a bit larger. It looked realistic, I'll give it that. It had creamy, smooth porcelain features. A handsome, sharp-pointed nose. A cute little dimpled chin. Fibres of dark blond hair combed back and brushing past his white ear lobes. Pretty glossy glass eyes, in a blue hazy colour. And the clothes he was wearing were pretty neat, too, I had to admit: He was wearing a fake plastic leather jacket, and blue jeans. It really amazed me how much people but time and detail into dolls to make them look so lifelike.

It was terrible of me, I know, but I still felt my happiness deflate a bit at what I held in front of me. _Of all the things to give someone for their twenty-fourth birthday, my best friend had to get me a weird doll? What am I, a little girl?_

Still, I ignored the disappointment crushing me within for the sake of making my best friend happy. "Thanks, I love it," I said, lying a little. All right, well, maybe I was lying_ a lot_.

"It's anatomically correct, too," Tara informed me with a deviant wink.

I felt my jaw hit the floor. "What? It actually _has_ a ding-dong?"

"It sure does. Want to check it out?" Her hand reached out eagerly to pull the lid of the box open. I slapped her hand away.

"No, Tara! I don't want to see a fake porcelain ding-dong, thank you."

"Come on, Sook. It looks real."

"I don't even want to start wondering how you know what his ding-dong looks like, Tara. You dirty pervert!"

"He has a name, too, and everything," she told me proudly. "His name is Eric."

I felt my eyebrows raise in disbelief. "He actually has a name, too?" I gasped, impressed. "Whoa, talk about dedication to your art!"

She looked me over nervously. "So you like it?" she asked uncertainly.

"Hell yeah, Tara! I absolutely love him! He's going straight to bed with me tonight the instance I get home!"

She laughed, relieved. "Well good. Glad you like it. I know it's kinda... weird." Weird was really an understatement, but I would feel way too guilty admitting to her that.

"So, where'd you find him?" I asked interestedly.

"Can't tell." She pursed her lips, fighting back a grin.

"Tell me! I honestly care to know!"

"Well, I went into this weird shop, and they had all this creepy shit. But I knew your type- you like buff, blue-eyed hunks- and since you're single, I thought... maybe you'd like to take Eric home." I grimaced at her words. Yes, I was still single, even at my age. I wasn't even much of a dater, either. Work and family took up most of my time.

"Well, he _certainly_ is coming home with me tonight," I told her, maybe hamming it up a bit too much. "Thanks _so much_, Tara!"

"It's cool," she shrugged, waving a hand around in the air dismissively. "Don't mention it. I'm just glad you don't find it too fucking weird."

"I don't!" _Liar, liar, pants on fire._ "I really don't at all, Tara!"

"Well, that's good." She dusted off her hands on the front of her shirt. "I got to get back out, Sook. Sam's probably gonna get shitty with me for waiting out here too long. Happy birthday."

"Thank you," I called back to her happily, watching her disappear through the hallway.

I glanced down at my new doll apprehensively. I just didn't know what I was supposed to do with the thing.

"Hello, Eric," I muttered down at it, grinning foolishly. "I'm Sookie Stackhouse, and I'm gonna take you home with me. You're a very lucky lad, you are."

I spooked myself out, because I thought I saw the Eric doll wink up at me. And then I realized how stupid that was of me, and pushed it into my bag. It must have been some weird trick of the light, that's it. Dolls definitely aren't real. How ridiculous of me. I slammed my locker shut, feeling my face burning like a fool over having talked to a doll as if it could hear me.

I could be so silly sometimes.

00

My shift ended at one-thirty that evening, so I went in and told Sam in his office that I was heading off.

I felt an odd, relaxed state overcoming me as I pushed out the door into the parking-lot to where my car was parked. I reviewed the evening mentally inside my head, feeling myself bursting over with joy. It had been an extraordinary evening. Because everybody knew it was my birthday today, they took it easier on me and didn't make me work on my feet so hard. I felt brimming with happiness and confidence over how well tonight had went. Maybe even too much so to even take notice of what was happening.

I unlocked my door, climbed in, and threw my bag in the passenger's seat near me. I slipped on my seat-belt, started the ignition, and straightened out the mirror to look behind me. I jumped very nearly half a centimeter into the air, clutching a hand over my chest weakly. A pair of light eyes were staring back at me from in the seat behind me. His eyes burned into mine with grave intensity. I could only so much as see the half of his face; His white skin, his intense lit eyes, his mouth. He had a hand up to his chin, and a long pinkie finger traced back and forth over the lining of his lips.

The right eye winked at me.

"What?" I breathed anxiously, at last managing to find my voice again.

Regaining my sense of movement, I spun around in my seat for a better look.

There was no one even there, damn it.

Yes, I must really have spooked myself out tonight. _Damn Tara and that creepy, realistic-looking Eric doll._

**Hope it isn't too weird :P I was inspired by Chucky from Child's Play. Thanks for reading, and I would love to hear whether you're interested in more.**


	2. Chapter 2

**Thanks very much for your interest. I'm so glad you find the plot interesting and different. Hope this makes it even more interesting to you! Thank you!**

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"Gran, I'm home," I called cheerfully once I got in.

I hung up my bag on the rack near the front door and delved a hand inside to pull out my Eric doll, so that I could show him to Gran and have someone there to express my half-hearted amazement on it. I saw that the cardboard lid was open. I frowned to myself. I didn't recall ever opening it, but just as I was about to start getting really freaked out by that, my Grandmother was attacking me without warning by springing up in front of me in the hallway. She clutched my face in her hands and swooped in on me to give me a peck on the cheek, laughing gleefully.

"Happy birthday, beautiful young lady," she cried, which was about the twentieth time she had done it since I woke this morning. Despite getting that all day from people, it still didn't fail to brighten me up.

"Thanks, Gran," I replied happily. Then I thrust the cardboard box into her hands. "Look what Tara got me! Isn't he handsome?"

She rushed into the kitchen to grab her reading glasses. Then she was back, reading the back of the box eagerly. She turned it around to peer at the doll through the plastic coating, squinting her eyes a bit. "Oh goodness," she said, smiling. "He is a very handsome doll, Sookie."

"I know, right? He's very cute for a doll. Tara said his name is Eric, too."

"That's very nice of her to get you a present."

"I know. Tara really is the best." I sighed. I would have to thank her again for it later. "Anyway, Gran. I'm heading upstairs, and getting changed. Mind if I jump into the shower?"

"Not at all. You go right ahead."

She handed the box back to me, and I kissed her on the cheek before scampering upstairs to my bedroom. I couldn't wait to hop into a nice, warm shower. A warm shower really was the best thing to do after a nice yet eerie day of work. I pulled the Eric doll out of the box and stowed him up on my pillow.

"See you soon," I told him, quite pleased I had someone to talk to, even if it was just a lousy doll that couldn't utter a single sentence back to me. I darted around the room, humming to myself while collecting everything I needed: My nightgown, clean underwear, clean socks, my hairbrush. I turned to look at my doll again. "Don't you get into too much mischief before I get back," I scolded him lightly, then laughed to myself quietly. I hoped it wasn't too insane having one-sided conversations to a doll. Then again, I was in the privacy of my own bedroom and no one else was around to consider it so. Who really cared if I talked to a doll, when no one was there to hear me?

Shaking my head to myself and trying not to wonder too hard on the state of my sanity, I padded my way into the bathroom and flung a towel off the rack at my feet. I plonked down the toilet seat and set all my fresh clothes on top, then spent a few minutes combing out my hair. Then enthusiastically, I pulled off my work clothes and stepped into the shower, turning the water on full-blast.

It was absolute sheer heaven after having been on my feet all day at work.

Although I had worked at Merlotte's for a little over three years now, I still got exhausted at the end of a gruelling day's work. You never really get used to it, but a hot shower was like what I imagined a massage would be to your overworked limbs. Singing to myself quietly, I blindly reached out for the shampoo. I squirted some into my palm, had a little indulgent giggle over the rude noise it made on me, and then started lathering up my hair.

The bathroom door creaked slowly open.

"Gran, I'm fine," I called out to her, passing my hands over my face to get all the water away from my eyes. "I won't be too long, I promise!"

Gran didn't answer, which was funny for her. Usually she would come in occasionally, pop her head in through the door, to check up on me and make sure I was still alive and breathing despite all the mist swirling around the bathroom from the heat of the water.

I heard the door close gently, and then footsteps coming around near the plastic curtain.

"Gran," I groaned impatiently, "I said, I'm fine. I'm still alive in here- obviously!"

Still, completely uncharacteristic of my Grandmother it was, she still didn't make herself known to me.

My heartbeat picked up a notch, when I heard heavy breathing through the other side of the shower curtain. I had a real bad feeling that this was going to be one of those horror-movie moments; I started panicking that some deranged murderer was going to spring up unnoticed on me on the other side of the curtain with a butcher's knife. This reminded me of that infamous and unforgotten scene in Psycho, where kooky Norman Bates pounces on the poor defenceless woman having a shower, stabbing her straight in the chest. And all that red blood trailing down the drain... Ick. I shuddered to myself, then focused on cleaning out all the shampoo in my hair. I didn't exactly want to be stabbed while my hair was still foamed up with the stuff. Really, I didn't want to be stabbed in general. Who wants that to happen to themselves?

Deciding to play against stereotype, I chose to startle my murderer instead.

In one movement I covered my chest and squeezed my legs together, and in another, I was whisking the shower curtain open to glare at my attacker reproachfully.

Standing outside the shower curtain, was some weird unknown guy I didn't recognize, who took the moment that had presented itself in looking my body up and down with some amusement.

"Oh, oh my God! You must be a friend of Jason's that I haven't met yet! What are you doing in here? Why aren't you with Jason?" I turned my back on him, but it was really already far too late and he had already seen enough of my bare body. Now, he was seeing my rear-view, and I had no hope in hell of covering that up.

I stole a quick peek at him over my shoulder nervously just to check what he was doing. He threw a wink my way, one that looked oddly familiar to me. And then it hit me. But how could that be?

"You're that man who was in the back seat of my car and then you... you just disappeared! Why were you in my car? And what are you doing in my house, of all places, you... you... weirdo?"

His eyes were glued to my butt. It was as if anything else I was saying to him wouldn't register because he was so fixated on it.

"Hmm... now _that_ is a nice ass," he murmured approvingly.

My breath hitched in my throat, and I felt fury take embarrassments place.

"Get out of here!" I shrieked, flinging the curtain back over myself. I huddled under the water, feeling all sorts of frightened. Who was this pervert?

Unfortunately for me, I couldn't finish my nice and relaxing shower, as much as I would have enjoyed to. Who could after all that? Instead, I had to make do with only shampooing my hair for the night. When I shut off the water and stole a quick peek out the curtain, I was very pleased to know that the mysterious pervert had disappeared. He probably had gone back into Jason's room. Surely, he had to have been a friend of Jason's, wouldn't he? I couldn't exactly say I had a lot of male friends. He must be one of Jason's new buddies, I decided. It seemed to ease my stress in thinking that way. Also, it made me less scared. Yep. He was most likely a new pal of Jason's that I hadn't been introduced to as yet.

I wrung out my hair, getting all the excess water out in the shower, then got dried and ready for bed.

When I got back into my room, I felt strangely comforted in knowing the doll, Eric, was still there, sitting comfortably on my pillow. "Gosh, the craziest thing just happened to me," I explained to him, while dropping all my dirty clothes in the hamper near my bedside table. "Some pervert was watching me in the shower, probably one of Jason's new sleazy friends. Can you believe that, Eric?"

I pretended he was agreeing with me, and laughed in outrage.

"I know, right? How rude was he, commenting on my butt like that? Talk about crass and creepy!" Speaking of creepy... Eric's little head looked a little off. It was tilted at a funny angle that I didn't remember placing it in. Sighing, I climbed up on my bed, and sprawled out on my stomach near him. I looked him over curiously. "You know, Tara says you're anatomically correct, huh?" My fingers itched to pull down his small jeans and check and see for myself. Then I sighed again and smacked myself on the forehead. "That's real dirty of me, I know," I admitted, chiding myself. "Don't worry. I won't look. I won't invade your personal space. It seems rude. I know you're just a doll, but... _still_. It's awfully rude!"

When the talking became pathetically and obviously one-sided to me, I sighed sadly and pulled the covers on my bed down. I slid in, and then he fell on me. I hadn't even yanked the covers down that hard, at least not in my view. But his little body fell straight on my stomach and along with it, it somehow caused his arm to raise and a small porcelain hand was almost touching one of my breasts.

This was getting far too creepy for me to handle. Or maybe I was just being stupidly suspicious tonight?

I've never been one to be afraid of dolls. In fact, I quite liked them. But this one was a bit scary to me.

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**Sorry about reposting the chapter- I just added a few bits, because it seemed funny to me. Or is it weird and my sense of humour is crazy? ;) Sorry if it's weird!**


	3. Chapter 3

**Thank you all so much for your alerts and the reviews I have received. I never thought anyone would be interested in this crazy, weird story. Hoping you enjoy this chapter! :-)**

**Chapter Three**

"Hey, no copping feels," I told my Eric doll sternly, like he could understand me. I grabbed him by his little waist and sat him beside me on the pillow. "Now there," I said, smiling at him like a dope. "There, you will stay. Goodnight, Eric."

I felt stupidity gnaw within at talking to a doll yet again, but drowned it all out as I turned on my side and clicked off my night lamp. I settled into the warm sheets, and closed my eyes, sighing with relief that another very long day had ended. Yet, at the same time, I felt a pang of sadness for tomorrow wouldn't be my birthday. No, tomorrow would be just another day. I wouldn't get the same nice greeting I got tonight at Merlotte's. No more presents, no more cake. Oh, well. At least there's always next year's birthday to get excited for...

I felt the doll roll over to my back my accident. It was sort of nice having somebody to talk to, even if it did make me crazy half the time. It was nice having somebody here I could talk to without fear of getting judged and having them talking back at me. He was a doll, he wasn't real. He couldn't talk back and argue with me. I was safe. I could say anything to him.

"Sweet dreams," I muttered over to him, relaxing into sleep. The next thing I knew, I was drifting off, feeling wonderfully content snuggling in my safe and warm bed. Drowsily, it registered that the doll was pressed up against my back, warming me through my nightgown. He didn't feel all cold porcelain skin one bit. No, he felt all warm, real skin. For a second there I think I'm almost dreaming it. But then the doll wriggled closer to me, pressing his face into the side of my neck and breathing shallow breathes over me, put a warm arm tightly around me, settling a strong hand on the curve of my waist.

Now why does it feel as though I'm sleeping next to a man?

Without daring to open my eyes, I rolled onto my back. I could hear someone muttering softly to me.

"I really need to get out of this body..." And: "I miss this. This is all the more reason that I need to..." I'm fairly certain he also said: "Really nice ass" again.

What the effing hell?

I was falling off the bed and crying out in one move. It was really too late for all this spooky stuff.

There, lying sideways on the sheets of my bed, propped up on his elbows, was that same-old random guy who had perved on me in the bathroom.

"What the hell? You are one seriously sick individual, mister! First, spying on me in the shower and now... sitting there in my bed! What the hell?" Jason really needed to drop this perverted friend of his. I vowed then in the morning we would be having a decent conversation about this.

He threw a wink at me from where he sat, and I covered my hands over my face.

"What is with you and winking? Seriously!"

I whirled around to look at the guy again nervously, and it occurred to me that my Eric doll was nowhere on the bed in sight. And then I sort of noticed that this pervy guy was wearing the exact clothes the doll wore- the leather jacket, jeans, boots- and I felt I was needing somebody to send me to a lunatic asylum stat. Could he be my doll? No, not possible. Absolutely not possible. It just couldn't happen. It wasn't something that happened. No way! But then where did the doll possibly get off to?

"Oh, my god," I breathed, feeling ill. I curled my arms over my waist and sank to the carpet on my knees. "I'm going crazy, I swear! Why am I even thinking like this? This is beyond insanity to think this way!" Taking in a deep breath, I stole a peek up at the guy. I found him rolled over on his side, watching me while I was suffering some type of panic attack before him. "How'd you get into my room? Or did you just... sneak into here when Jason was asleep?"

"Who's Jason?" He asked, sounding sincerely confused. "Oh, and you let me in here yourself. Don't you remember?"

"What?" Oh, this was just too crazy. I rested my elbows on my knees and ducked my head. "Who are you?"

I heard my bed squeak as he climbed off it. And then, before I knew it, I risked one peek to find he was kneeling in front of me. Being closer the way he was, I could see his facial features more clearly, and what I saw, it made me feel a billion times worse. He had those same light blue eyes. The same adorably dimpled chin, even, as the doll had. The same combed back, fair hair, brushing neatly to his ear lobes. How was this possible?

I waited for it with bated breath. And when it finally came, my head spun. "I'm Eric."

Oh, Jesus. How can it be a coincidence then that he goes by the exact name the doll does? How can it be a mere coincidence that he looks exactly like the doll, but in flesh form? My head kept turning and for a moment I feared I was about to faint. Then it occurred to me it wasn't fainting my body had in mind. I felt it rise in my throat, and I covered my mouth just in the nick of time as I gagged. I was going to throw up. I was maybe even going to throw up on this poor guy. He really had to get out-of-the-way.

"Excuse me," I gasped, getting to my feet. And then I ran. Luckily, I made it into the bathroom in time and the instance I found the toilet, contents of what I had only just eaten today emptied themselves out of my stomach.

I heard someone run in after me, and I knew it was him. I didn't even have to look to know it.

He grabbed my hair and held it carefully while I heaved again and again. It was rather nice of him, but this was just too creepy for me to handle. How can a human turn into a doll? How could a doll turn into a human? How could any of this be real?

Once I no longer felt the need to throw up, I sagged in relief. Vomiting can be very exhausting on the body, I learn. "Is this a cruel joke?" I asked, wiping my mouth.

"Joke?"

"Well, how can this be true?"

"I've often wondered about that myself," he said dryly. "I've speculated on it all. Either way, answers don't really matter. What matters is that I'm stuck in a fucking dolls body until dark. Does that seem like a hilarious joke to you? If this was something happening to anyone else other than myself, I would be laughing too. But it isn't."

"How long have you been like this?"

"Over a hundred miserably long years."

_A hundred?_ "What?"

He stepped closer to me so that I could see his face more clearly. There came a funny noise, and then two long, sharp teeth were glistening below his top lip. I swallowed loudly. Were those-?

"Vampire," he said casually, seeming to answer my thoughts.

"Oh." Instead of throwing up, this time I fainted. One moment it sunk in and I felt such horror, and then, just as suddenly, the walls were moving around me and blood was rushing up to my face. When I somehow woke again, somebody's arms were slipped around me and they were cradling me close to them as if I had weighed next to nothing. I felt like a child, as I opened my eyes slowly to find the guy was holding me. He must have carried me into my bedroom, because I realized I was on my bed, I was lying on his lap, and he was leaning down over me, watching my face closely for any sign of progress into coming back to consciousness. He bent down over me and I felt his nose brush up against me. I could faintly hear him inhaling in through his nostrils, too. He was smelling me. I sure hoped I wouldn't become a meal to him. This was beyond all reality. Not only could this doll turn into a man, but this man was also a... vampire?


	4. Chapter 4

**Thank you guys for being so nice and supportive over this crazy little story. :-) Hoping you enjoy this one. I promise to update more quickly, I'm sorry for how long it has taken me. Sorry if this one is really lousy!**

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_**Chapter Four**_

Although he was staring right down at me, I just couldn't believe my eyes. Since when are dolls actually real people? And since when do vampires actually exist? I felt paralysed with shock, as I blinked up at him. He simply peered back down at me expressionlessly with those two glistening long fangs extended near his front teeth and, as self-awareness slowly settled into my system again, it dawned onto me that I was still resting with my head in his lap with my long hair spilling out all over me. Regaining use of my limbs, I sat up slowly and pushed away, creating a bit of distance between us on the bed that made me feel more comfortable. I was needing all the space I could get.

"Are you going to kill me?" I choked out in a horrified voice.

He gave me a wry look at that. I could tell he was holding in a laugh. "No, I'm not going to kill you."

"Is this for real?" I blabbed nervously. He had already made it perfectly clear on me that it was, but I was still having difficulty believing.

"Yes, this is for real. I know this may come as a shock to you, but you really need to relax." His voice was gentle. Soothing, on me. "I'm not going to kill you, I assure you. And besides, you have offered me a home to live in. Someplace warm, and safe. Why would I repay your generosity by killing you?"

That was a fair point well made. But it wasn't exactly true. Tara had brought me him, after all. I had no say in the matter; It wasn't as if I knew beforehand that it was possible for him to turn into a man who roamed around the house after dark. Had I known that in advance, well... I probably wouldn't have been as accommodating.

I stared at him wordlessly. I know it was rude of people to stare, but I was just bewildered and shocked. I also felt a little tempted to touch him, make sure he was real. And that was exactly what I did. I lifted a hand and tentatively ran the tips of my fingers down the long bridge of his nose. His eyes closed and he flinched a bit, evidently not expecting me to do it. But I just couldn't help it; I just had to feel him and make sure he wasn't a figment of my imagination. He felt real, all right. His nose felt like real skin, but hard and cooler than the temperature of my fingers. When I glided my fingers across the side of his cheekbone, under his adorable dimply chin, I could even feel little prickly hairs like stubble on his skin. Then I raised my other hand, sat them on top of his shoulders, and gave him a good hard squeeze, feeling how solid he was.

He was a real man, he was really made of flesh and bone- and he was an incredibly attractive one, at that. It felt weird to consider him attractive, though, since he was mostly a porcelain doll half the time. But I had no control on feeling that way.

And then there was his fangs... I had never seen anything quite like them before.

Since he seemed perfectly fine with me copping feels of his face and shoulders- albeit a bit rigid and cautious not to move- I put the tips of my fingers on his lips and pushed them underneath the opening of them. Heck, his teeth felt real as well. So did his gums. His fangs felt glossy, pearly under my fingers, and when I pressed my finger into the sharp tips of them, they felt incredibly sharp, too. It was amazing.

After a few more minutes spent feeling around, his eyes opened slowly and he stared back at me. I felt my face go as red as a lobster as I put myself back into a right and responsible state again. How awkward it must be on him, for me to just feel him up, while he sat there. It seemed he had worked out exactly what I was attempting to do with it all, because he said quietly, in a scratchy voice,

"Satisfied?"

I felt my face flush even redder as I placed my hands in my lap and clasped them tightly so I wouldn't be tempted to touch him anymore. "Sorry," I croaked nervously, with a small laugh. "I just wanted to make sure you were real, and that I wasn't dreaming all this like a loony." I laughed again, when he simply stared at me. He was probably getting to thinking I was such a kooky girl. "How'd this happen to you?"

"Oh, it's a very long story." He laid back against the headboard of my bed, and brought his hands up to clasp them behind his head, looking the epitome of relaxation.

"Try me," I demanded eagerly. I felt that if I had more of an explanation, it would be somehow easier to believe.

"A bitch witch put a curse on me," he muttered underneath his breath sullenly. "She said this hokey-pokey chant and transferred me into a porcelain dolls body. And now, here I am." He pulled one hand out from behind his head and waved at himself, by way of explanation. "I was stuck in a store for the past forty years, until a dark-skinned woman purchased me, which leads me to you..."

"That dark-skinned woman is my bestie, Tara," I told him breathlessly. "I don't really know why she thought I would like a doll, 'cause I'm way too old for one, but... she knows how I like my men hunky and blonde." Yet again, I was babbling. I hardly knew why I felt it necessary to tell him of my preference when it came to the opposite sex. Apparently it had him relieved, though.

"Well, isn't that wonderful to hear?" he remarked, squinting over at me thoughtfully. "Perhaps we can come of beneficial use to each other? I haven't experienced sex in this body for years."

I was flabbergasted by that. _Um, where did that suggestion come from?_ Well, really, I did think I had a few theories. This was the very same pervert who had disrupted me in the shower, and who had also commented on my butt. Why should it ought to surprise me?

"So... a witch cursed you?" I asked, bringing the conversation back onto right territory. I hadn't even known witches existed in the world, no less. Good grief.

He huffed out an irritated breath through his mouth. "Yes, she did."

"And how're you meant to get back to normal, then?"

The Eric Doll/Man/Vampire stared at me pensively for a few minutes. He seemed lost at sea. "I have no idea. But it has really messed everything up. No doubt my progeny Pam is looking for me. She probably assumes I'm dead."

This was really way too much for me to take in. My head was in a whirl, I couldn't even think straight.


End file.
